Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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