Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize