his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize
