its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
well most of my day revolves around power hour
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
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