I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
