I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
