just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
