spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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