You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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