He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize