Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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