I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
She bit a glass in half.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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