did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
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