the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
so let's talk penis.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
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