Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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