we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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