In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
