And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
