i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
