who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Randomize
