What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
