am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
