Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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