i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize