We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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