and you said cock pushups were impossible
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
