when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
