Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
