idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
it was like eating out sand paper
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
