i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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