My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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