Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
