Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
BRING THE BAGELS
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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