I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
