That's when you crack a 10am beer
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
