i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
