Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Randomize
