Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Randomize
