Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
