Small penises have feelings too.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
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