Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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