Got a toothbrush?
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
bring money and cleavage
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
