Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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