I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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