Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
