Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize