I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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