my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
