Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
