I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
