so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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