i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Randomize
